I posted this on my FaceBook page a few days ago:
" Last night my neighbors packed up their kids and all of their belongings and walked away from their home. They bought at the height of the real estate market and were terribly upside down on the property. After more than a year of struggling they had enough. They left in the middle of the night because they were embarrassed. They shouldn't have been..."
You hear about the foreclosures and people loosing their homes but when it hits so close to you, the affects are sobering. Our neighbors purchased their home around 2006 or 2007. The previous owner was asking $550,000.00 but the price was eventually lowered to $535,000.00. At the time, that was considered a bargain for a 1600sq.ft, 3Brm., 2.5Bth home. Within 24 months of them moving in the homes dropped to a low of $400,000.00. Could you imagine paying $2,700.00 each month knowing that you're upside down by $135,000.00? So, what choice did they have? They couldn't refinance the property. I guess they could have continued paying the outrageous interest on the loan and hope that the home would eventually appreciate to their original purchase price...in ten or twenty years, perhaps. It's sad, there really was no easy way out, short of a rich benefactor, relative or friend. So, they walked away from their investment, taking with them a tab for over a half million dollars.
A couple of months ago, my neighbor across the street also moved out suddenly and without warning, though the circumstances were quite different. The neighbor across the street moved here about 2 years ago. I'll call her "Jane".
I met Jane and her husband when they were moving in. They were standing out front of the house and I waved at them as I past by; it was the neighborly thing to do. This started a daily ritual of obligatory waves which eventually led to a few brief but pleasant conversations. One day, Jane came over to my house and wanted to talk about a problem she was having. I invited her into my house and she began to tell me about the neighbor that lived next door to her. Jane told me that her neighbor had two large dogs and their backyard was in serious need of cleaning. The neighbors didn't clean up the after the dogs and this caused an infestation of flies. When she went to talk to the neighbor about the fly problem, an argument ensued. Since the neighbors were renters, Jane thought it would be best to talk with the homeowner instead. When the neighbor found about that Jane spoke to their landlord, the neighbor began threatening her. According to Jane, the neighbor told her that she planned to burglarize her home at the first opportunity. The neighbor then began making harassing phone calls and trying to look over her fence and into her backyard to intimidate her.
This all seemed a bit strange. I don't actually know Jane's neighbor but I do know the owner of the home that they're renting. The homeowner is a Lt. with the San Jose Police Department and the renters are his niece and her fiancée. I couldn't imagine that type of thing going on with them but then you never really know people, do you? Jane asked me to keep an eye out for anything suspicious and of course, keep this between the two of us.
A couple of days later, I noticed a police car in front of Jane's house. A short while later, a police officer walked out of her home and over to the neighbor's house. I saw the officer enter the neighbor's house and saw the door close behind him. I didn't hear from Jane for a couple of weeks so I assumed things were all worked out.
About three or four weeks later, I came home to find two police cars in front of Jane's house. The officers came out of her home and stood outside for a long time talking. Soon, a district supervisor drove up and joined the conversation. They talked for a long time and eventually, each officer got in their cars and drove off.
A day or two past and there came a knock at my door, it was Jane. She appeared to be really on edge and wanted my help. Jane needed to go to the grocery store but she was afraid to leave her house. She said her last run in with the neighbors really had her scared. She was sure that her neighbor was going to vandalize or break into her home if she left. I asked her where her husband was and she told me he was at work. At this point, I felt it was time for some straight talk. I told her that she had to find some way to make peace with the neighbors or she should consider moving elsewhere. This ongoing feud was clearly unhealthy and disruptive to their lives, something had to change. Jane agreed but her immediate problem was that she needed some basic household items and was afraid to leave home. So, I did what any good neighbor would do, I agreed to house sit while she went shopping.
When I arrived at her home, I was completely stunned. Her home was absolutely immaculate. It was like a semiconductor cleanroom. It was as if someone sterilized the home and sealed it shut, never allowing anyone to sit on the furniture or walk on the carpet. Even the fresh fruit on the counter was perfect; not a bruise or blemish! Contrast that with our home; Danielle's graffiti on our walls, the juice and ink and "who knows what else" stains on our carpet. I was almost afraid to touch anything. Jane told me to make my self at home (yeah, right). She told me that I could use her computer or watch TV until she came back. Before leaving for the store, Jane warned me that her neighbors had a habit of listening through her walls.
"Listening through the walls?" That comment struck me like a Mac truck. "Listening through the walls?" Could this be what I think it is? How could I have not seen this? I sat there in stunned disbelief for the next 45 minutes.
When Jane came back, I decided it was time to probe a bit deeper into the issue with the neighbor. I told her that the neighbors didn't pose a problem while she was gone but I wanted to know all about what was happening. Jane went into great detail about the battles and threats she has endured with the renters next door. Jane told me that the neighbors were not only listening through the walls but they were climbing on her roof attempting to break in. I asked how they would access the house through the roof since she had no chimney or fireplace. She wasn't sure how they were going to break in but they were determined to try.
I left Jane's house with a heavy heart. Jane wasn't much older than 25 years old. Her husband was slightly older and they had just started their lives together. For most newly wed couples this is a time to pursue your dreams as partners in life. It was really sad to witness the devastation that schizophrenia can have on an individual and on a family. What about her spouse? What was he experiencing? Did he know of her condition before they were married? What about the collateral damage; the neighbors who were falsely accused and had the police called on them repeatedly?
As the former Executive Director of The National Alliance on Mental Illness in Santa Clara County, you'd think that I would have seen the signs well in advance.The obsession with the neighbors, the wild accusations and irrational complaints should have been indicators of a deep seeded problem. I should have seen it but I didn't. She was such a nice and sympathetic young lady that I wanted to help, I wanted to believe her.
So, my neighbor across the street also moved out suddenly and without warning, though the circumstances were quite different.
San Jose, CA. |
I met Jane and her husband when they were moving in. They were standing out front of the house and I waved at them as I past by; it was the neighborly thing to do. This started a daily ritual of obligatory waves which eventually led to a few brief but pleasant conversations. One day, Jane came over to my house and wanted to talk about a problem she was having. I invited her into my house and she began to tell me about the neighbor that lived next door to her. Jane told me that her neighbor had two large dogs and their backyard was in serious need of cleaning. The neighbors didn't clean up the after the dogs and this caused an infestation of flies. When she went to talk to the neighbor about the fly problem, an argument ensued. Since the neighbors were renters, Jane thought it would be best to talk with the homeowner instead. When the neighbor found about that Jane spoke to their landlord, the neighbor began threatening her. According to Jane, the neighbor told her that she planned to burglarize her home at the first opportunity. The neighbor then began making harassing phone calls and trying to look over her fence and into her backyard to intimidate her.
This all seemed a bit strange. I don't actually know Jane's neighbor but I do know the owner of the home that they're renting. The homeowner is a Lt. with the San Jose Police Department and the renters are his niece and her fiancée. I couldn't imagine that type of thing going on with them but then you never really know people, do you? Jane asked me to keep an eye out for anything suspicious and of course, keep this between the two of us.
A couple of days later, I noticed a police car in front of Jane's house. A short while later, a police officer walked out of her home and over to the neighbor's house. I saw the officer enter the neighbor's house and saw the door close behind him. I didn't hear from Jane for a couple of weeks so I assumed things were all worked out.
About three or four weeks later, I came home to find two police cars in front of Jane's house. The officers came out of her home and stood outside for a long time talking. Soon, a district supervisor drove up and joined the conversation. They talked for a long time and eventually, each officer got in their cars and drove off.
A day or two past and there came a knock at my door, it was Jane. She appeared to be really on edge and wanted my help. Jane needed to go to the grocery store but she was afraid to leave her house. She said her last run in with the neighbors really had her scared. She was sure that her neighbor was going to vandalize or break into her home if she left. I asked her where her husband was and she told me he was at work. At this point, I felt it was time for some straight talk. I told her that she had to find some way to make peace with the neighbors or she should consider moving elsewhere. This ongoing feud was clearly unhealthy and disruptive to their lives, something had to change. Jane agreed but her immediate problem was that she needed some basic household items and was afraid to leave home. So, I did what any good neighbor would do, I agreed to house sit while she went shopping.
When I arrived at her home, I was completely stunned. Her home was absolutely immaculate. It was like a semiconductor cleanroom. It was as if someone sterilized the home and sealed it shut, never allowing anyone to sit on the furniture or walk on the carpet. Even the fresh fruit on the counter was perfect; not a bruise or blemish! Contrast that with our home; Danielle's graffiti on our walls, the juice and ink and "who knows what else" stains on our carpet. I was almost afraid to touch anything. Jane told me to make my self at home (yeah, right). She told me that I could use her computer or watch TV until she came back. Before leaving for the store, Jane warned me that her neighbors had a habit of listening through her walls.
"Listening through the walls?" That comment struck me like a Mac truck. "Listening through the walls?" Could this be what I think it is? How could I have not seen this? I sat there in stunned disbelief for the next 45 minutes.
When Jane came back, I decided it was time to probe a bit deeper into the issue with the neighbor. I told her that the neighbors didn't pose a problem while she was gone but I wanted to know all about what was happening. Jane went into great detail about the battles and threats she has endured with the renters next door. Jane told me that the neighbors were not only listening through the walls but they were climbing on her roof attempting to break in. I asked how they would access the house through the roof since she had no chimney or fireplace. She wasn't sure how they were going to break in but they were determined to try.
I left Jane's house with a heavy heart. Jane wasn't much older than 25 years old. Her husband was slightly older and they had just started their lives together. For most newly wed couples this is a time to pursue your dreams as partners in life. It was really sad to witness the devastation that schizophrenia can have on an individual and on a family. What about her spouse? What was he experiencing? Did he know of her condition before they were married? What about the collateral damage; the neighbors who were falsely accused and had the police called on them repeatedly?
As the former Executive Director of The National Alliance on Mental Illness in Santa Clara County, you'd think that I would have seen the signs well in advance.The obsession with the neighbors, the wild accusations and irrational complaints should have been indicators of a deep seeded problem. I should have seen it but I didn't. She was such a nice and sympathetic young lady that I wanted to help, I wanted to believe her.
So, my neighbor across the street also moved out suddenly and without warning, though the circumstances were quite different.